Beers and Bubbles and Ghost Stories

Friday night. My flatmate Emma and I literally have £4.30 in 5p between us.

In the fridge, we have two beers and a bottle of bubbly left over from the happier days when money was not reduced to raping our respective coin jars (ie three days ago).

So we sat in the kitchen with the last of our booze, a shared pack of tobacco and YouTubed the soundtracks of Nightmare Before Christmas and The Corpse Bride.

It was an awesome night.

Did you know that Wes Craven was inspired to create Nightmare On Elm Street after reading about a few guys who supposedly died from nightmares? Yeah, me neither. Supposedly he saw a couple stories in the paper, and NOBODY put two and two together and connected the stories. But what happened was this guy apparently was terrified of his nightmares. And everybody just said ‘Dude, it’s just a nightmare’ be he was going, ‘No, I’ve had nightmares before, AND THIS IS SOMETHING DIFFERENT.’

So his family loaded him up on sleeping pills and tried to take care of him. And six days later they heard him screaming in his sleep, and by the time they got to him he was dead. The autopsy said there was no medical cause for his death, but in the closet they found all the sleeping pills he had only pretended to take, and a coffee maker he’d been using to stay awake. He stayed awake for six days.

He probably died from exhaustion, but still. Pretty spooky, huh?

Also, if you ever want to watch Last House on the Left, watch the new one, not the old school Wes Craven one. That man did a lot of things right, but this movie was not one of them. At one point, the policeman KNOW there is a killer at the house, and when their car breaks down on route, the policeman comically stamps on his hat and mutters. Like, the whole scene reeks of slapstick, and you just want to scream ‘THERE’S A MURDERER ON THE LOSE. USE THE FORCE AND MAKE SOMEONE GIVE YOU A LIFT.’

But they don’t and the people die.

The end.

Just kidding. If you want to watch a truly excellent horror movie, I suggest one of the following options:

The Exorcist (Director’s Cut. It’s worth it.)

Paranormal Activity 3 (Yes. I assume you’ve all seen the first one. I haven’t yet seen the second. But the third terrified the crap out of me.)

Red Dragon

Nightmare on Elm Street

The Shining

The Strangers

Woman in Black (Daniel Radcliffe is excellent. You totally forget he could get out his wand and go Harry Potter on the ghost’s ass.)

And MAKE SURE YOU STAY AWAY FROM:

The Hills Have Eyes 2

The Possession

Any movie where people are super freaking predictable and generally do the complete OPPOSITE of what a human being would do in a similar situation.

Happy Halloweening 🙂

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